I’ve never had sex, or a girlfriend. I don’t masturbate, since it was an exercise in futility. I can ejaculate but it’s never felt “good”. I don’t think about having sex, but I recollect that normal, healthy guys think about sex once every 10 seconds. (!) I cannot force myself to picture a sex act, its like my mind has to jump past it. But, I do obsess about my inability … every day I think about how I’m inferior. This makes me wonder if there is somebody out there to talk to about this. Sex therapy is about couples, so that’s not for me. Is there help out there?

I have sought help for depression, poor sleep, and low testosterone.

I suffer from chronic depression (severe, if you believe online tests). Over the past 20 years, I’ve seen two psychoanalysts and a psychologist for therapy. Primary care physicians and a psychiatrist have subscribed 1/2-dozen anti-depressants, mostly SSRIs. Neither therapy nor drugs have helped. I’ve also tried herbal supplements, kept a diary with thought analysis, improved exercise, and adopted two cats.

I’ve also attacked the poor sleep aspect (depression can cause sleep problems or vica versa). I had a sleep study, but they were only interested in finding obstructive sleep apnea (which they did, and I’ve been using a CPAP for the last two years without fail). I’m taking care to exercise good sleep hygene, tried sleep aides (nytol, melatonin, zolpidem, etc.), got a new mattress, prop up legs, and have a wedge pillow for my head. Nothing works.

My testosterone did test low (~190 ng/ml, normal 300-800). I saw an endocrinologist (and, typical for a doctor, couldn’t find a cause) who prescribed hormone replacement with patches (vs. gel or shots). I did try the patches, which didn’t make me feel different but I did get a rash.

What’s left to try? I’m 40 years old, and thinking that I should just give up.

Best answer:

Answer by Mary
it is because of your depression. Fix depression and you’ll be like other men

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Im really worried because she has a history of cancer in her family (her mum and dad both died of cancer). She doesnt seem to care at all about her health. Every time i try to talk to her about it she yells at me and tells me how shes had a weight problem all her life and she cant change it now. She says its too hard.

I dont know what to do or what to say because everytime i talk to her about it she yells at me and gives me the silent treatment until shes sure i wont bring it up again.

Please give me some ideas as to what i can do. Im out of ideas.

Thanks,
Andrew

Best answer:

Answer by Patricia C
Diabetes and cancer are not related so don’t worry about that. Regarding the diabetes, if it is bad enough her doctor will recommend medication or even insulin injections. I know because I am diabetic. I suggest that you talk to her about these alternatives rather than bugging her about what she eats because that won’t get you anywhere.

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Best answer:

Answer by Linda R
Lymph nodes usually swell as a result of some kind of systemic infection. If it comes once a year it is not lupus, HIV, or cancer. I doubt it is related to your sleep apnea, but the heat may be. If you are in doubt, call your doctor. Better to be safe than sorry.

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He used to call me on the telephone every night and we talked for about three to four hours (not always about my church) and I was getting very annoyed.

He also has had for many years:

Congestive heart failure
Severe asthma
Cellulitis of the legs
Sleep apnea
Obesity (well over 300 pounds)

Given all these conditions at once, how has he survived for so long unless it’s for the reason I stated? Since 2002 he had kept telling me his time was “short” until two years ago. He has stopped telling me that because he knows I won’t believe him anymore. Am I wrong in being skeptical about his sicknesses and thinking he is either a hypochondriac or being deceived by an evil spirit.

Best answer:

Answer by Sgt. Sarcasm
He is definitely hypochondriac. It’s a mental illness of a sorts. He is not being deceived by an evil spirit. He is just trying to get attention with these so called “messages from god”. Either that or he is insane.

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I’ve been going through a hard time lately and I haven’t really filled any of my friends in on the details. They have no clue I’ve been very ill and I don’t know how to tell them. I don’t want to seem like I want attention or special treatment, because I don’t… I just want them to understand I guess

I’ve been diagnosed with severe hypothyroidism, pernicious anemia, sleep apnea, vitamin deficiencies, and I’m being sent to the cancer center for suspected Cushing’s disease caused by a brain tumor. I really just don’t know how to tell them all. I haven’t touched base with them in a while so this is why it feels awkward. It would be over facebook as they all live far away. What should I do? How should I bring it up?

I just feel like an annoyance and a bother with my health issues…. Thank you so much. Blessings.
@vikram the pituitary is in the brain. As I have not been taking steroids to cause cushings, the tumor is either in my brain (pituitary) or on my adrenals on my kidneys. Some of the others do not have a cure, but instead are managed. I could go into more detail, but it’s complicated. Unfortunately, I’m not feeling well but I’m hoping to soon. I’m keeping my head held high.

Best answer:

Answer by Kevin S
post it on facebook then the world can see

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And he does not have insurance, so we are trying to find something from the pharmacy..

Best answer:

Answer by Jerry
The skin issue is probably not be a true rash, but rather annoyed by the friction of the straps rubbing against it. That happened to me as I was starting CPAP use. A few ideas:

Try hydrocortisone cream or spray to calm the irritated skin.

Try loosening the straps a bit. If your father sleeps on his side, the pressure of his face against the pillow can keep the face mask in place without being so tight.

Try routing the tube down to the mask from above his forehead instead of up from below. This will lessen the amount of air flow around his nose and help prevent drying out.

Make sure the equipment is cleaned daily, especially the parts that come in contact with the skin.

See how long it has been since your father replaced the nose piece.

Soak the water tray in white vinegar every so often. Make sure it is rinsed and dried daily.

Best of luck.

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Best answer:

Answer by Altrissa
You may have sleep apnea. Even though you think you are sleeping for 9 hours, you’re actually waking up many times during the night, interrupting your sleep/wake pattern to the extent that you’re not getting enough actual sleep.

Are you overweight or have sinus issues? Those are two of the most common causes of sleep apnea, but anyone can have it. The best way to tell is to go to a sleep clinic where they can give you a machine to monitor your sleep habits.

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Can anyone shed some light?

Best answer:

Answer by Chris
If you google ’schwartzexpander’ there’s more info than you need.

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Anyway, because I have had to cancel twice (and he knew the reasons, and I am not a difficult patient), he will no longer prescribe my sleep meds. I need those meds as this is going to be a very long journey, I am in Cognitive Behavioral Treatment, am on CPAP, and it is going to take a long time before all this insomnia gets straightened out. Anyway, I told him this was abandonment, and he got really upset and I have no medication.

Isn’t he supposed to prescribe my medications until he finds me a comparable doctor, or until I find one? I am desperate.

Best answer:

Answer by Cindy
He is not refilling your meds because he wants to see you in his office. If you are taking something like Ambien he cannot refill it without you following up with him. I wouldn’t have made him mad either. I know doctors and trust me even the best don’t like to be threatened. No, he doesn’t have to find you a comparable doctor either. By canceling your appointments and refusing to come in you have in fact abandoned him. Even if your reasons were good ones. He does have to send your notes to another doctor when they are requested. He also must give you a copy of your records if you request them however, usually they require you to come in and sign a release for the records. Also they may charge you a small fee for copying the records. Not all doctors do that but some do. He won’t charge you for sending them to another doctor but you will still need to sign a release. This is a HIPAA regulation.
Do you not have a friend, parent, sibling, etc that can drive you to his office? Surely you know someone that will take some time to drive you to the doctor so you can get your medications. If I had to take a taxi to go see him I would. It may cost you some money but it would be worth it to get the treatment that you need. I will also tell you it is very unusual for a doctor to give sleeping pills to someone with sleep apnea. They can cause many problems if you are not monitored properly. Another reason he is not calling in your medicines.
If you are canceling appointments and refusing to come in to talk to him you may need to find another doctor because he may not feel comfortable treating you any longer.
Find someone to drive you if you are able to get an appointment with him, apologize to him when you get there, and then do what he says.. He really does know best in this situation.

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Best answer:

Answer by Helen R.
Hormonal changes & weight gain during pregnancy can trigger or worsen sleep disorders! I would recommend heading to a sleep center — don’t self-diagnose.

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